The Rosek Family

Belly Comparision 8 weeks - 17 weeks

2012-02-08T08:18:00.000-08:00

17 weeks pregnant

2012-02-08T07:51:00.000-08:00

And feeling great. Yesterday I didn't feel any movement from the babies which my doctor said was normal at this stage. She said I could feel them one day and then not feel them for a week. Once you get to 20/24 weeks the movements are stronger and more consistent. This morning when I sat down I believe I felt both babies move. I am really looking forward to feeling the strong kicks and rolls.

I stepped on the scale this morning and it says I have gained 3 more pounds......in a WEEK!!!! I may outweigh my husband by the time this pregnancy is drawing to a close. There seems to be a 3 pound weight difference between my scale and the doctors which means today my scale said 135 so the doctors office would say 138. This is really fine by me, if I keep this up I will reach the goal for twins of gaining 20 pounds by 20 weeks. 6 more pounds to go!

I also measured my belly this morning. Last week I measured 35 inches around and today.....

37 inches around!! I grew 2 inches in a week??!!! Wow Momma.

Other than that we have been home the past 2 days, have not gone anywhere. Cassie came down with a cold on Sunday night. Every time she sneezed a boatload of snot would come out of her nose and she finds it move convenient to drop her dirty snotty Kleenex on the floor instead of the garbage can. She has spent alot of time on the couch watching cartoons....we have watched The Little Mermaid every day. I found myself singing the songs in the shower yesterday, is that sad? I think she is finally getting better, no more snots sneezes but she does have a little cough and does not want to go to story time today. However, we do have to leave this afternoon to head to Children's Hospital. We are meeting with her ENT because she has one tube left in her ear and with another doctor to look at her "curly" toe. We were going to wait to have the toe fixed next winter but next winter is going to be a teeny weeny bit busy with twins so we figured it would be best to get her toe fixed now. The doctor will look at it today and schedule surgery....which will be #5 for Cassie.

Watching TV this morning

Above are the outfits she wears when around the house. She picks them out....obviously. She was watching.....drum roll.....The Little Mermaid.

What you don't want to see when your about to order food...

2012-02-06T07:06:00.000-08:00

Saturday we went to Culvers for lunch.   It was noon so the place with packed. We were at the counter and I just started ordering our food when I heard "Blech!"   I look down and Cassie had thrown up. It was running down her coat and on the floor.   Could she have picked a better place to have pucked....a restarant?   Gross out! The poor people behind us. I quickly picked her up and ran to the bathroom.   We got into a stall and I started cleaning her up and asked what happend, if she didn't feel good etc.....

She felt fine, she told me she stuck her finger in her mouth and must have stuck it to far in because she gagged her self so up everything came.   Well, it was a releif to hear she wasn't sick.    I couldn't put her coat back on since it was puke covered, after getting cleaned up we went back to order.   Yep...were not going to let some puke stop us from eating although I have to say some of my appetite was gone.   Poor Matt, I had left him out in the lobby so he had to use napkins to wipe up the puke.    He thinks he got the raw end of the deal :o)

I couldn't stop laughing thinking about the whole episode.   I really couldn't eat much either because even though I washed my hands multiple times I swore everytime I brought a french fry to my mouth I could smell vomit on my hand.

Well, its something I will always remember and laugh at!

Valentines Day Party!

2012-02-06T06:47:00.000-08:00

On Friday we had our friends over for a little Valentines Day Party. Everyone made decorated boxes and we filled out valentines along with some other little goodies.

Table set

Waiting for her friends to arrive

Little gift bags I made up

The girls played dress up in Cassie's room and the boys hung out at the train table in the living room while us Moms caught up.

Cassie and Morgan

The boys

Strike a pose

Adelyn and Cassie

Then it was snack time....

We headed to the basement to play for a while after eating. The kids played ping pong along with some other things.

This was taken right before a fight started because Cassie didn't want help with her tower

Thankfully it was time to exchange valentines so Cassie got over the tower building tears pretty fast.

The boxes

Getting ready to exchange cards

The happy kids with their cards and gifts

16 weeks pregnant

2012-02-02T13:01:00.000-08:00

This pregnancy is really going fast. I think chasing after Cassie makes the time fly by, and like with a first pregnancy thats not all you think about since you have another child to take care of.

I am feeling alot of little movement every day, most of it when I am sitting down, Definitly nothing consistent. We have decided to measure my stomach every week and keep track of how large I get. It will be fun! I measure 35 inches around right now.

I bought a maternity swimsuit since we like to go swimming at the Y with Cassie. I put it on and when Matt saw me he laughed. He said I just was really poking out. Which...I am. But I love it. I love being pregnant and am so grateful to be pregnant again and with 2 babies on top of it!!! Such a blessing. The sales clerk at Motherhood Maternity said most likely I won't fit in the swimsuit in my last couple of months because of carrying twins, I'm sure I won't feel like jumping into a swimsuit at that point anyway.

I personally know 2 people who have been trying to get pregnant for a long time and they have both found out they are pregnant with twins. One was thru IUI and the other thru IVF. My friend who did IVF emailed me yesterday and said "Your not going to beleive this...its twins and I'm not kidding" I am so happy for her and I got goosebumps reading her email.

Strawberry Jam

2012-02-02T12:40:00.000-08:00

Mmmmmm.....nothing like homemade strawberry jam. My Grandma used to always make it. Its SO much better than smuckers...blech. And its easy to make. I helped Cassie make her first batch of strawberry jam. She only ate 4 of my strawberries...not bad but I suppose they needed to be taste tested. I assumed they past the test when she started chomping on strawberry # 3.

Stirring up the crushed strawberries and sugar

So good on a slice of buttered toast!!!!

16 week appointment

2012-01-30T13:49:00.000-08:00

My blood pressure is good and I gained another 3 pounds for a total of 11 pounds. I am measuring in at 18-19 weeks pregnant if I were pregnant with a singleton. We had our ultrasound and both babies are looking great. Moving around and kicking. We asked the doctor if she could tell the genders. Baby A is on my right hand side, is breech and had his/her legs crossed so we couldn't make out the gender. Baby B is on my left hand side and we got a clear shot of the gender. We aren't going to say anything untill our big anatomy scan in 3 weeks so we can confirm Baby B's gender and see if Baby A has changed position so we can tell the gender. Below is what the babies look like at 16 weeks pregnant in the womb.

First Dentist Appointment

2012-01-26T11:50:00.000-08:00

Cassie was pretty excited to go to the dentist, we read books and she knew what to expect. She happily got into the dentist chair and felt all the instruments they showed her.

Waiting patiently while we told the nurse her history of Pierre Robin

When it came time to lean the chair back that is when she became a bit unsure of things. I can't blame her....all of a sudden she is on her back with a light in her face. I sat on the other side of her and held her hand. Puppy of course came along for support.

Bib on...getting ready

Cassie did NOT like the spinning brush to clean her teeth. She was gagging and crying. The nurse tried but then decided to go to a regular tooth brush to do the cleaning. Cassie felt much more comfortable with this and did very well.

Sunglasses to wear so when she is on her back the light isn't in her eyes

We also tried to have x-rays done but Cassie's mouth is so small it wasn't working. We will try again next year. She was a good sport in trying it. After her cleaning the dentist came in. He is a pediatric dentist and seemed to know a bit about Pierre Robin. He looked in her mouth and tried counting her teeth and feeling around inside for any abnormalities, she is missing her last molars to come in and he said she may just be behind in that. Again, Cassie's mouth is so tiny this was making her gag, her eyes were watering, it definitely wasn't pleasant but she was a trooper.

Afterwards she got a balloon, a new pink Dora toothbrush, new toothpaste, a sucker and I took her to the book store to pick out a new book...she picked a Clifford book she has had her eye on.

All done!

She said her favorite thing about the dentist was her new pink toothbrush and her least favorite was the spinning toothbrush. Good job at your first Dentist Appointment Cass!

Speech Skills

2012-01-25T10:29:00.000-08:00

This morning we had a follow up appointment with Cassie's speech therapist at Childrens Hospital. I sat back and watched the therapist work with Cassie....so proud of her. Her therapist said Cassie is doing fantastic. She also said she has excellent articulation and has no nasal emission as a result of her cleft palate. No nasal emission!!!! This is the best news ever. She told me "You have done a great job working with her Mom" she said it can be hard for a parent to work with a child on speech and for the child to respond. She told me I should become a speech therapist and work at Childrens. What a compliment! I almost cried. But I have to give credit where credit is due....Cassie is so easy to work with and willing to learn. So proud of this little girl. We would normally go back for follow up in 6 months but because the therapist knows the twins will be around by then she she is pushing off the appointment till fall.

Cassie has become so independent lately. She wakes up anywhere between 6 - 6:30 in the morning and will watch cartoons and drink her milk in the living room by herself for at least an hour so Mommy can get some more shut eye. If she gets bored of cartoons she gets the IPad, turns it on, finds her apps and plays. She is opening the fridge to get her own drinks and answers the phone for me. When it rings she presses the speaker button and says "hello." Daddy called once when I was in the middle of something so she answered. She told him she was watching Mikey Mouse and that I was in the shower...then hung up on him. Yesterday the phone rang and she was going to the bathroom so she yelled out "Mom, can you get that?" Oh my gosh....it was so funny.

First little kick

2012-01-24T15:14:00.000-08:00

I was sitting at the computer actually reading about when people first felt their twins move. I have been feeling flutters here and there but its so hard to pinpoint if it is truly the babies. While sitting here I felt a pretty good flutter and then a couple seconds later a definite little kick. It made me jump. Its the first time I have felt movement where I know for sure it was one of the babies and not something else. It made me teary eyed...so amazing Gods miracle of life. Tomorrow I am 15 weeks, I didn't feel Cassie move till after I was 18 weeks.

I have been reading posts from some twin chat rooms and I just don't get some of the posters. Some women will ask questions like....is gaining alot of weight or having a big bump a sign of twins or some other question that members think are stupid so they are snarky and jump down these women's throats and they are so rude. It blows my mind. These are mothers of children and they are just being down right nasty and they even seem to be on a high horse because they have had twins. They have said "Twins are not the trendy thing to do so don't wish for it, its hard work and until you have been in our shoes you won't understand". I mean really?? Yes, I know its going to be harder than 1 but its not going to be the end of the world like these women act. I mean I had 1 baby with so many problems, so many hospital visits and surgeries and I never acted like these women. Yes, it was hard but when your put in a situation you just do what you have to do and you survive. Cassie's first year was rough but I never thought it was terrible. If I would have been told before I had her what was in store for me I would have been scared stiff and wonder how I was going to do everything...but when your actually placed in it you just do what needs to be done. Anyhow, some of these women drive me nuts reading their posts, seeing how mean they are, and their attitudes. Those boards are not for me.

Hello 2nd Trimester!!

2012-01-18T10:09:00.000-08:00

14 weeks pregnant with the twins today! I have seen so many sites say you are in your 2nd trimester at 12 weeks, 13 weeks or 14 weeks so since I am 14 weeks today I can offically say I am in the 2nd trimester no matter how you look at it!

Still feeling great. I've thought I have felt flutters a couple of times. Looking foward to those movements where you know without a doubt its baby. I have been so blessed, so lucky with each of my pregnancys to feel great, to have no morning sickness, to basically feel like I am not even pregnant except for the belly. However....with this pregnancy I am getting the sciatic nerve pain. If I sit on the couch a certain way it really hurts and I have a hard time walking.

Saying "hi" to her brothers or sisters

14 weeks - today

My Mom and Grandma just stopped by. My Grandma is in her 90's so she just says whats on her mind. We were sitting around talking and she said "Boy Melissa, your gaining weight" Thanks Grams :o) Then she said "Wow, big boobs and big tummy" Ha ha! Gotta love her.

Sledding,late Christmas, and events from today

2012-01-15T13:33:00.000-08:00

We finally got a snow storm last week. Cassie and I went sledding and afterwards made chocolate chip cookies. Perfect things to do when its a cold snowy day!

Yesterday we finally celebrated Christmas with Matt's side of the family since everyone is over the stomach flu. Cassie fell asleep in the car on the way there so was very clingy and not in a good mood when we got there. She broke into a few tears for no reason. Once she woke up and got over being groggy she had a blast with Sarah and Valerie. She loved Grandmas Roast Beef and kept asking for more of the "chicken". Whatever.
After dinner we opened presents and then had desert. Then the sugar high from desert kicked in and she was a nut running around the house.

Playing Hello Kitty Bingo

Sarah, Cassie and Valerie

The girls were harassing Uncle Jim

Monkey Papa and Cassie

Being tickled

Monkey Papa is not feeling very well as a result of the liver cancer. He is turning yellow and the doctors said if he is not feeling better in a week its not looking good. :o( Say some prayers.

Opening presents

Today I helped out in Cassie's Sunday School class. I could see some jealously this time as a result of me being in class. I had 4 little girls who also wanted to sit with me and Cassie wasn't to thrilled with that. One little girl kept rubbing my leg and Cassie didn't like that either.   She was upset and when it was time to pray she was the only one who wouldn't sit down and pray and was almost in tears and voicing her feelings.   Ugh!!!!    I told her to sit down and be quite and then ignored it.....my prayer was she wouldn't melt down in class and I would have to bring my child out of there for a time out.   Thankfully she didn't and got control.    Phew!

Later this afternoon we went to the Y to go swimming and then to play.   There was another girl in there who I went to high school with and her little girl was there. She is younger than Cassie but they did NOT get along.   The first words out of Cassie's mouth were " I don't like her".   Said it right in front of her Mom. Nice.   Cassie was pushing a chair into her legs. Purposefully. Then they all went into the big play gym and Cassie starts to cry.   She told me the little girl hit her. So there was an apology from the little girl.   Then Cassie says " I hit her but she hit me back".....like totally shocked that this little girl hit her back.    I told her Mom that the real story came out.    Back in the play gym them went. I went over to supervise since I knew they were not good with each other.   The little girl was purposefully kicking Cassie's pony tails with her feet which made Cassie melt down into tears because her hair was getting ruined.   This signaled it was time to go home.   I don't know what it was but Cassie did not like this little girl.   On the way home she kept telling us how naughty the little girl was. I told her "Well you were naughty to. You hit her first" Cassie said "I know, I know, I'm sorry Mom".

After refereeing those 2 I need a glass of wine.....but can't.  We had a talk about it and her behavior.   I'm sure I will be dealing with fights once the twins are born and older.

12 weeks and first OB appointment

2012-01-06T11:55:00.000-08:00

It feels good to be 12 weeks pregnant.   That's all I can say.

Today I met with my OB for the first time.   At first a nurse weighed me. She asked how far along I was. Then she asked if this was my first pregnancy.   I knew what she was getting at. I told her I was carrying twins.   She said that explains it, she didn't want to come right out and say it but she said I am alot bigger than someone should be at 12 weeks. I gained more weight which is good.   I started out being 124 before I was pregnant and now I am 132. So I have gained 8 pounds so far.   The goal for twins is 45 pounds.

My doctor came in and we did the whole big talk about twins.    I need to take more folic acid than a someone with a singleton pregnancy.   I can't pick up Cassie after I am 24 weeks pregnant. I asked her about bed rest and she said she can't ever remember putting anyone on bed rest with twins because it doesn't help with preterm labor or anything.   Our goal is going to be a vaginal birth at our hospital right in town. As long as the first baby is head down and bigger than the second baby a vaginal birth will be a go.   If the second baby is breech she would do a breech extraction.   My normal due date would be July 18 but with twins I won't go past June 27th.   They would induce me if I don't go into labor by then.

After the twin talk we got to look at the babies. She doesn't use the Doppler because its to hard identifying both babies heart beats so every visit I get a ultrasound....I LOVE that!!   She said both babies looked great. Baby A is very active, kicking the legs and bouncing everywhere while Baby B seems more mellow.

It was a great visit and I'm very happy with what my doctor had to say and with the plan for birth.

Yea for being 12 weeks pregnant with twins!

Baby B is up higher and Baby A is lower.

12 weeks pregnant - measuring 14 weeks

Goodby 2011....Hello 2012

2011-12-31T14:32:00.000-08:00

2011 was a pretty good year. Cassie turned 3 years old. I love this age....just like I loved 2 . We took our second family trip to Great Wolf Lodge. In April we decided to do another IVF cycle and were told we had a problem with blood antibodies, would be high risk and shouldn't become pregnant. Turns out this doctor was wrong, we decided to find another clinic. In Oct we find a new clinic and proceed with IVF, it works our first time again and we find out we're pregnant with twins!

The sad thing with 2011 is Matt's dad was diagnosed with Liver cancer and is fighting that.

The plans for tonight are feeding Cass her dinner and when she goes to bed we are making some yummy steaks, potatoes, veggies and watching movies (The Help). Hopefully I can keep my eyes open to watch the ball drop and welcome in 2012.

Here is to 2012. A big year for us. Welcoming Twins in summer and Cassie becoming a big sister....could it get any better?

and my drink of choice tonight....

cheers!!

Christmas celebration this week to be rescheduled...

2011-12-29T08:38:00.000-08:00

Thursday - Saturday we had plans to celebrate Christmas with Matts side of the family. However we have decided to not join in on the festivities. One part of the family has had the stomach flu this week, I quess they are feeling better now but we don't feel comfortable hanging out with them and going to their house after they have just been throwing up the past 4 days. Even if they feel better they are still contagious. The last thing I want is a stomach bug going around our house. Being pregnant and throwing up does NOT sound appealing to me. I know we could get the stomach flu from anywhere but that is unknowlingly. I know being pregnant if you are throwing up and can't keep fluids down alot of times you end up at the hospital for an IV to receive fluids.....does not sound like something I would like to be doing.

So its sad that we won't see anyone and miss everything. I don't think Matts Dad is joining in the Christmas celebration either because he is not feeling well from the Cancer and I'm sure the last thing he also wants is the stomach flu.

As I was typing this I just got a phone call saying everything is cancelled because another family member of Matts caught the stomach bug last night. Looks like everything will need to be re-scheduled.

We haven't had the stomach bug in over 10 years and if I can keep up that trend it would be awsome. I know the likely hood of that happening is low but I can dream.

Belly shots

2011-12-27T06:24:00.000-08:00

I think I had a big growth spurt from Christmas Eve to Christmas Day. I woke up and told Matt "I think I got alot bigger over night"

Christmas Eve

Christmas Day

Its crazy how much I am showing already. We went to the pool yesterday so I looked for a swimsuit. My bikini is out of the question so I went for my tankini which had fit 2 weeks ago. It looked horrible this time around, it ended at my belly button so the tankini was out of the question also. I ended up sitting on the sidelines watching all the fun in the pool. I need to invest some money in a maternity swim suit. I didn't show like this with Cassie till I was over 18 weeks along and I am only 11 weeks tomorrow! From what I have read with Twins you measure 4-8 weeks ahead of what you would be with a singleton. Wowser...how is my belly going stretch like that??

Christmas 2011

2011-12-27T06:14:00.000-08:00

We had a really nice Christmas. I'm always kinda sad when the Christmas season is over. I love the music, the lights and spending time with family.

My brother came home from CA for a few days to visit also, so that was really nice. Cassie loves him.

Matt suprised me with an IPad for Christmas which was awsome!!! I love it!

My brother and I

Papa and Cass - opening some early gifts

Watching Charlie Brown together

Athena and her new coller

Getting a belly rub from Cass

Family shot (Matt was at work)

She loves her Uncle Lee

With Gigi and Great Great- Grandpa

Stocking time!

Athena opening her gift

Christmas Eve

Christmas morning

Opening her big present

It took us 2 hours to assemble Christmas Eve night

She is realizing what it is...see the big smile!

Her words were "Wow, my very own train table!"

"Thank you Daddy"

End of Christmas Day

We had a wonderful time with my family. Matt took down our tree already yesterday. Pooh. We see Matts family and celebrate this week and then its New Years!!

10 weeks/1 day pregnant

2011-12-22T14:27:00.000-08:00

I graduated from my fertility clinic today!!   I was full of anxiety when I went in today.   Since I don't have any symptoms besides hunger I start to wonder if everything is ok. I know it will be much more reassuring when I can feel the babes moving.

It was amazing how big they had grown since 2 weeks ago.   And they actually look like babies!   They have heads, arms, legs and fingers. And were they putting on a show for us. They were waving and somersaulting around. AMAZING.   At one point they both put their hands to their face. The same hand to the same side of their face. Our doctor said they were so in tuned to each other. She said she has never seen twins do that before....they were like synchronized swimmers!   Dr. Hayes kept saying they were doing awesome.   I just wanted to cry.

Both babies measured 10 weeks/2 days. Baby A had a heart rate of 163 and Baby B was 168.

This was where they were putting their hands to their face

One of the babies - solo shot

After the exam she told me she would meet us at the front desk, so I got dressed and went up there. The staff had a "graduation/congratulations" gift bag for us. Inside were 2 adorable stuffed animals for the babies and 2 sets of combs, files and fingernail clippers. How sweet was that? I told Dr. Hayes thank you for everything and gave her and my nurse a hug.
I'm so thankful for her expertise.

Our gift bag

Aren't they cute!

Cassie kept asking to hold a stuffed animal and asked where hers was. Here goes the sibling jealousy!   As we were leaving the front desk asked us to wait a second.   Out the nurse came with a stuffed animal just for Cassie.   How thoughtful was that.

And no more shots or pills!!

What a wonderful early Christmas present.   I am so thankful for Cassie, for the 2 babies growing inside of me and for everything God has blessed me with.   My cup definitely is overflowing!!

Great Wolf Lodge 2011 and visting the Capitol

2011-12-21T06:23:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend we were at Great Wolf Lodge and had a great time. Cassie went down her first waterslide and went on her first roller coaster. I was a bit nervous about the coaster because it really whipped around at certain points but Cassie said she wanted to go. She did great and Daddy is the one who looked nervous while on it.

First water slide!

Down the big slide with daddy

She found the perfect Target

Lazy River

Doing the Wolf Howl

Loved this!

Isn't this awesome?

Heading to our room after storytime - bedtime!!

Rowdy the Reindeer - her fav!!

I couldn't go on any of the water slides because of being pregnant so I stood on the sidelines. I have been feeling great. No morning sickness or anything (same as with Cass) . If I didn't see the u/s I wouldn't know I was preggo....with 2 on top of it.

We headed home from the Dells yesterday and stopped in Madison to show Cassie the Capitol. There is a huge Christmas Tree in the Rotunda. Well, wouldn't you know it, there were tons of protestors in the Capitol chanting to recall Walker. Really? They were surronding the Christmas tree singing songs about recalling Walker to the tune of Christmas songs. It was horrible. I was fuming. People have their own political views...fine. But what are you accomplishing by surrounding the Christmas tree and butchering Christian Christmas Carols? This is what my daughter had to see? Disgusting. I pushed my way thru the crowd with Cassie so she could see the Christmas tree...I wasn't going to let these people stop our daughter from seeing the Christmas tree with their protest. Really people. And please don't take the Christmas songs about our savior and butcher them....really. Not very classy.

First Bump Picture

2011-12-12T15:59:00.000-08:00

8 week baby bump

I didn't start to show with Cassie till I was 20 weeks or so, totally different this time around. I'm sure its because its my second pregnancy, my ab muscles never went back together after having her and there are 2 bambinos.

Over the weekend we went to Matts Christmas party. Of course it was so nice to get out and have dinner and drinks. (aka...cranberry juice and water for me) Matts aunt and cousin came over to babysit. Cass stayed up an hour past her normal bedtime and slept till 8:30 the next morning. Her usual wake up time is 6:00. The angels sang!! We didn't make it to church because of all of us sleeping in so we snuggled on the couch, ate Cinnamon rolls for breakfast and hung out with the family.

Heading out for dinner

8 week ultrasound

2011-12-09T11:27:00.000-08:00

Today I am 8 weeks, 2 days pregnant. We went in for an u/s today and everything looks fantastic. My doctor said the babies look great.

Baby A measured 8 weeks/2 days and had a heart rate of 175 bpm
Baby B measured 8 weeks/3 days and had a heart rate of 171 bpm

It was such a relief to see that they are growing like they should. I was given the go ahead to make an appointment with my normal OB in 3-4 weeks. My OB also did IVF and had twins so it was be nice to have some one who was in my shoes to talk to. I go in on Dec 22 for my last u/s at the fertility clinic, that will put me at 10 weeks. At that point I should be able to stop taking my shots (whoo hoo!) and graduate to my OB!

I have also gained 3 lbs in less then 2 weeks! At 6 weeks preggo they weighed me in at 124. Today I was 127. No shocker there since I can't fit into regular jeans anymore and I have the makings of a baby bump. The weight you are supposed to gain with twins is alot!!! Looks like I shouldn't have a problem with this! :o)

And here are the little buggers!

Why I never thought twins would happen...

2011-12-05T08:16:00.000-08:00

My first clinic did the e-tegrin test and told me I was missing a important protein that aided in the implantation of the embryos. I had to be on Lupron Depot for 3 months to hopefully correct it. My new clinic said they did not believe in this test so they didn't do anything in regards to it.

My first clinic did assisted hatching while this clinic did not.

My first clinic transferred 3 embryos and only 1 attached...and with very low HCG levels to start out with. So low that they said it was a chemical pregnancy and that I would miscarry.

So I thought we would be lucky if 1 attached. I never imagined both of them would.
Praise God!! It can be intimidating to think about having 2 newborns and carrying 2 babies but I know God created these two babies and knows each of them already so that helps put things in perspective. My husband said as long as these babies are healthy it will be a breeze compared to Cassie. Having a newborn with a feeding tube, oxygen, surgeries, pulse oxymeters was hard. If we have 2 healthy babies that will be less stressful that one baby that requires constant medical care and worry. Maybe God was prepping us for this.

Its funny the reactions we have had when we tell people were having twins. All of the reactions have been from men. When we showed friend A the u/s his words were "you guys are screwed" Haha.

Friend B said "Jackpot" and gave me a high five

Friend C just thought I was joking and stared at me like a deer in headlights until I made it clear I was not joking.

My latest reading material

2011-12-04T10:34:00.000-08:00

This is my new reading the past week.   I have to prepare myself!! Definitely alot more goes into a twin pregnancy than a singleton..jeepers creepers!   Some of the stuff is scary to read but just have to take each day at a time.

I'm still feeling good...no morning sickness so lets hope it stays that way. I am just ALWAYS hungry. I have to eat every 2 hours otherwise I do start to feel gross.   I carry food with me wherever I go. I also fell asleep on Cassie's bedroom floor yesterday while playing with her. She just sat by me and played while I slept for 30 min. Friday we have another u/s so hopefully both babies are still doing well.

Cass is loving Sunday School now and this morning was rearing to go. On the homeschooling front the preschool workbooks we work on are becoming to easy for her. I am thinking of moving on up to Kindergarten level stuff.   Some of the stuff may still be to advanced for her but the preschool stuff is a breeze so we will see.

We made Christmas wreathes the other day.   One for our kitchen, her room and both sets of grandparents.

The rest of this day we are going to do some more crafts and also make some Christmas Bark and come cookies. Light the apple Cinnamon candle and have the Christmas music going. Now we just need snow!!

She told me she wrote "T's"

Words of encourgagment

2011-11-30T05:55:00.000-08:00

I have been so blessed to have such a great group of friends.   It has been so nice the past 1 1/2 years to hang out with such a wonderful group of mommies and their children.   When your a stay at home mom it is really nice to have a support group like this.

I let all of them know our news of Twins.  They all had such great things to say and offered support if I ever needed help.

One friend emailed me "Your going to be one busy woman but if anyone can do it you can"

And another emailed me "And don't get overwhelmed thinking about having twins...if there is anyone who can do it, it is YOU. I view you as super mom because you are always so good with all of the kiddos at our playgroups! :)

How sweet are these words of encourgagment?

Another friend who had twins wrote me this "We need to talk girl"   Hmm...does this sound encouraging? hahah!!!

Twins

2011-11-29T06:01:00.000-08:00

It is such a blessing and I still can't get over it. It does explain why I am already starting to show and can barely wear my jeans anymore.

I am excited but also scared.

I was picturing having another baby, breastfeeding, coming home from the hospital right away....basically this pregnancy and birth being easy peasy since we had so many complications with Cassie.   Well...Twins won't be the case.   They usually require a NICU stay, most likely I would be a c-section and I could be put on bed rest.   My friend who had twins said I am in for a long 9 month ride but it will all be worth it.  I know she is right and I am going to do everything I can for these 2 babies inside of me. What a journey God has laid before me.

I am also scared in regards to the logistics of twins. Feeding, picking them up and going places when I am by myself and then also throw in a preschooler.   This will be a challenge for sure. At least Cassie will be close to 4 by the time they come.  She knows there are 2 babies.  When we told her she said "Holy Cow" then she said "I get one baby and you get the other" Works for me Cass...I am going to need all the help I can get.

I also want things to be normal for Cassie once the babies come.   So my plan is once I am in a routine that I will still try to do all our normal activities we do now. Still go to our friends house for play dates (plenty of hands there to help me) still do story time and some parks.   Now big things like the zoo I will hold off for when Daddy is around.   The scary part of all this is being just me with 2 hands and 2 newborns.   I'm sure once they are here and I'm in a routine it will be fine. Its just me sitting here thinking about everything.

I already woke up at 2 in the morning thinking of all the things we need to buy.   I thought we were set on baby stuff but Twins means we need 2 of everything. We need another baby shower!! Haha!

Wow. Again, so amazing I have two little babies inside of me. Man...how huge am I going to get?    I am going to need to be on extreme makeover after this! Ha!

That God has entrusted two more babies to my care...what an awesome responsibility.

6 weeks and 5 days preggo - 1st U/S

2011-11-28T11:22:00.000-08:00

Today was our big day. I was full of anxiety. Once minute I was calm and confident and the next minute thinking they would do the ultrasound and not find anything.

I layed down on the table. Cassie sat in a chair and held my hand while Matt stood. My doctor started the u/s and I saw it right away.

We are having......

TWINS!!!!!!!!

Holy Cow huh?? I am still in shock. I have to admit I freaked out at first. All I can still keep saying is holy cow. When I called my Mom I almost burst into tears. I just can't believe it. Both babies looked great. They are both measuring right on time, both of their sacks are measuring great and we heard both of their heart beats. Both babies hearts were in the 120's. At this time with Cassie her heart rate was 111 so these babies are going strong. We have to go back in next Friday for another u/s to make sure everything is still going OK, we are still so early in this pregnancy but our doctor said so far everything looks great and she sees nothing that concerns her. So that is our big surprise. And here are our twins

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-26T09:20:00.000-08:00

We went to my parents house for Thanksgiving this year. My Grandparents came, my aunt and Matts parents came There was plenty of food and it was so yummy....especially dinner. I could not get enough mash potatoes and gravy. Mmmmmm. So good.

Me, Cass and my Dad

Cass wanted to do the same pic with Daddy in it

We also watched the football game and our Packers are still undefeated. Go Packers and Go Aron Rodgers!!!! I'm usually not into football but the Packers are making me want to watch.

Hugging Papa

5,4,3,2,1......

Blast off!

We could tell Monkey Papa wasn't feeling the best when he was over. He has another round of chemo on Tuesday. Say a prayer that all goes well. Cancer is a horrible thing.

Cassie loving on Athena

Color time

Almost Monday. I normally don't wish away the weekends but this time I kinda am. The wait is way to long. And why do I google things I shouldn't?   Like Blighted ovum? Why do I do that?   I not only read one article on it I will continue to worry and torture myself by reading multiple articles on it.  I need to stop.

We put our Christmas tree up last night. Cassie helped hang all her ornaments, she has Hello Kitty, Cinderella, Dora and a few others. She has know taken all of them off the tree and is playing with them on the floor like they are dolls.

She now just came up to me with marker dots all over her arm and told me she has poison ivy.   Oh that girl. Off to wipe off her arm now.

Ear Infection

2011-11-23T14:51:00.000-08:00

Cass has had a stuffed up/runny nose and a plemghy cough for the past week.   A few nights ago in bed it made her wake up and she was gagging on it.  She ended up throwing up because of all the gunk in her throat. I was worried it may be the stomach flu at first because I know its going around but thankfully it wasn't.

The other night she told me her ear hurt and the next day it was fine.   Well she was still coughing today and I looked at her ear...it was pretty gunky so I took her to Urgent Care since there were no doctor appointments available.   She does have an ear infection and is now on amoxicillan twice a day and ear drops twice a day.   This is the first time she has ever had to take any meds by mouth. When she was a baby I just squirted the meds into her g-tube.   She was a champ about taking the meds.   She actually said it was yummy, its nice to know I don't have to hide the meds in ice-cream or pudding or have to keep her from spitting it out.

We are ready for Thanksgiving tomorrow! Especially me....I am starving 24/7 so I am looking forward to all the yummy food. Yes, I am going to stuff my face.

Teaching and t-minus 1 week for u/s

2011-11-20T16:51:00.000-08:00

Today was my first day in helping teach Sunday school and I really enjoyed it. Cassie was so excited I was staying in the room today to be one of her teachers. She also did really well listening to the other teachers when they said something even though I was in there...I kinda wondered how that would go.

At lunch when we prayed she said "Dear Lord, thank you for making my Mommy my teacher". Awwwww!!

This past week has been SLOW. This 2 week wait for my first u/s is worse than the 2 week wait to find out if I was pregnant. I just find it so hard to believe I am pregnant even though my beta numbers are nice and high, even though the nurse says my numbers are great, and even though I took 2 pregnancy tests. I need to see it on the u/s. I need to see a little beating heart. I am going to be so anxious on the u/s day!! I think its so hard because of everything you go through with IVF to get pregnant and when you see that positive result you are freaked out it will be taken away from you. I know its out of my hands and stressing out about it won't help anything.

Pregnancy symptoms are still being hungry all the time. I wake up at 3 am starving. I'm also tired. The past 2 days I have fallen asleep on the couch while Cassie watched cartoons in the afternoon.

Cass and I are ready for this week to fly by! Also looking forward to Thanksgiving with all of our family and putting up our Christmas tree on Friday. I LOVE this time of year.

Crazy Lady....right here

2011-11-15T08:28:00.000-08:00

So I fretted all night about my beta number last night.    I called my clinic this morning and left a message for the nurse asking for a 4th beta number for my peace of mind. After I left the message I googled and found other woman who's 3rd betas took longer to double because of how high their beta was getting.   After re-reading that betas take longer to double once they reach 1,200 and other women's experiences I wished I hadn't have called my clinic...they probably thought I was a nut ball.

My nurse called me back and said "So you want another beta?" I said "Yea, and I am probably being crazy".   She agreed with me that I was being crazy....but it a nice way. :o)

She said that once betas reach a certain point they stop doubling and if I did a beta tomorrow I may not see doubling again because of how high my beta is. She told me
"You have great numbers" (And she emphasized the word great) "and your numbers are very reassuring. " She told me to try to remain calm and relax untill my u/s.

I was looking over my cycle with Cassie.   At 19dpo with her my HCG was 329 and with this pregnancy its 1,661.   That is a pretty big difference!

Deep breath. It was so good to hear this nurse tell me that I am indeed crazy....and also reassure me that my numbers are great.

Beta 3

2011-11-14T11:54:00.000-08:00

Beta today was 1,661. I was a little concerned because it hadn't quite doubled so I asked the nurse about it. She said it doesn't have to double, that they want to see a 65-75% increase in the numbers. They wanted to see me at least at 1,600 and she said I'm above that so there are no red flags. Then of course I had to google and everything said a normal doubling time is 48-72 hours. My doubling time was 55 hours. From what I have read my doubling time may decrease since my HCG is above 1,200. So from what google and my doctor says all looks good. Still nerve wracking untill the u/s!!!

I have no more betas and an u/s schedule for Monday the 28th. Its going to be a long 2 weeks! With Cassie I had an ultrasound at 5 weeks so they are making me wait an extra week.

Beta #2

2011-11-12T11:55:00.000-08:00

This morning we were out the door at 7:45 to head to our clinic for my second beta. After my blood was drawn we went to Einsteins Bagels for breakfast and then to The Big Backyard for some fun playtime....I love that place!

Around noon we headed home and got the call. All looks good. My HCG went from 404 to 896! My Progesterone and Estradiol were also good. We head back on Monday for Beta #3!

Beta.....

2011-11-10T12:10:00.000-08:00

  I am Pregnant!!!!!!

I went in for my blood draw around 10:00.  The nurse asked me if I had any idea what it would be and I told her no...it could go either way.  Crampy here and there.   The one thing I didn't mention is that I have been extra hungry the past couple days. I will eat and an hour later I will be starving again but I didn't want to say anything because I thought it was all in my head.

We got home at 11:00 and the first thing I did was finally take a home pregnancy test.   I could not take waiting for the phone call.  I saw the second line right away and I was like "No way"!    Then I jumped around holding the pregnancy test in my hand thanking the Lord.

I didn't want to tell Matt or anyone else that I was pregnant until after the beta number came in. My clinic didn't call until 3 hours later so I am glad I took the test. The nurse said my beta number was very good....404! At this time with Cassie my number was only 46 so that is a huge difference in beta numbers! I was hoping my beta would be at least 100, I was not expecting 404! I go back in on Saturday and Monday to confirm the numbers are doubling and then we will schedule an u/s if everything continues to go well.

Thank you to everyone for all their thoughts and prayers!!!!

Tomorrow is Beta Day

2011-11-09T07:03:00.000-08:00

I have been pretty calm the whole 2WW.   I have no clue what the result will be...not any idea. I have some cramps here and there but thats about it.   When I was pregnant with Cassie I had minor cramps and no other symptoms my whole pregnancy. So its pretty hard to say if the result will be positive or negative. I have stayed away from HPTs. I was tempted so I would just know because the wait does get to you but I don't want to see a negative and then still have to continue shots and still have to go in for the Beta tomorrow...that would be tortue to me. Best to just wait for Beta day.

No matter the outcome I am glad we tried this again otherwise I would always have wondered.   We could try again if this doesn't work out but to spend another $18,000.....not crazy about that thought. If insurance covered IVF I would do it again, and again and again with out a second thought.

If it works what a blessing that will be.   If it doesn't we have our one little blessing that we are so thankful for. We will take her to Disney World next year and all sorts of fun family vacations to look foward to.    So much to be thankful for no matter what the outcome.

Our embryos

2011-11-03T13:20:00.000-07:00

Here they are!!

Today is my last day of bed rest. Its been nice but I am looking forward to getting back into our routine. Laying on the couch you tend to just dwell on symptoms you may or may not have. Tomorrow I have a blood test done to check my progesterone and Estrogen and then we are off to a play date. Can't wait to see all our friends!!!

Embryos on board

2011-11-01T13:11:00.000-07:00

Everything went smoothly yesterday, however the transfer was delayed an hour because my bladder was not full enough....oops. They transferred 2 embabies. The embryologist said they were excellent and felt we had a good chance with them.

All our other guys didn't make it to freezing. I was sad to hear that.

I do have a picture of our embryos that I will post later this week. For now I am taking it easy on the couch.

Today is Transfer Day!

2011-10-31T05:15:00.000-07:00

Its so surreal that we are transferring today. Its exciting yet scary.   Exciting because my embryos are being put back where they belong and I could get a positive pregnancy test later this week....I can't even wrap my head around that.     Its scary because of course I may not have that positive result.   After all the money spent, shots given, doctor visits there may be no little baby to show for it.   But I know God is in control and whatever his plan (positive or negative result) I have comfort in knowing that.

My Mom should be here in less than 2 hours and we will be off.   I am preparing myself for the full bladder.   Last time it was way to painful so I am going to down my bottle of water 30 min before the transfer rather than the hour.   After transfer I have to stay there for 2 hours so I have my magazine, kindle and DVD all ready to go.

Also looking forward to my 3 days of just laying on the couch doing nothing.   Catch up on reading, movies and my hubby serving me.

"He knows me"

2011-10-30T09:20:00.000-07:00

These are the words Cassie used to describe why she loves Jesus

Today we dropped off our Operation Christmas Child box at church.   We included a sheet of paper that Cassie "fills out...aka Mommy" and the child who receives the box finds out about Cassie.   One of the questions was "I love Jesus because...." so I asked Cassie why she loved Jesus. She said "Because he is nice, he knows me and knows my name". So I wrote that down. I was Wowed by that.

She walked right into Sunday School and asked the teacher to do puzzels.   She did so great today. When I picked her up the teacher called her name. Then she told me Cass was doing puzzels and didn't want to leave.   Wow...big change from her first few days in Sunday School. She must have finnished her puzzle because she came out the door, saw me and did a running flying leap into my arms and hugged me.   So proud of that girl.

On the way home from church she said "Halloween isn't about Jesus, its about scary stuff. Christmas is about Jesus" Again...just amazes me and brings tears to my eyes that she is learning so much about Jesus and his love.

This is the best job in the world. Being a Mommy and being given the awsome responsiblity to raise her to know Christ.

Day 3 for our embabies

2011-10-29T13:50:00.000-07:00

The embryologist called at 8:30 this morning to give us our update. He said on day 3 they expect the embryos to be at 6-8 cells. 7 of our embryos are where they need to be while one of them is lagging behind at 5 cells. So 7 out of 8 are doing good so far! Go embabies!!

Apple pie baking

2011-10-28T15:57:00.000-07:00

Today Cass helped make her first apple pie We had to use all the apples that we picked from the other weekend. However, she did not get any for dessert because all she ate was 3 potato chips and none of her sloppy joe at dinner time. So no apple pie for this girl.

Stirring up the sugar and Cinnamon

Ready to pop in the oven

A pain in the....

2011-10-28T15:51:00.000-07:00

A%$ ....I mean Arse.

Literally

The needle I use for progestrone in the behind

First experience apple picking in pictures

2011-10-28T15:47:00.000-07:00

Uncle Jim

This is his normal behavior

Valery and Cass

Wagon ride to go apple picking

Searching for apples

Tasting her find

Egg Retrival and Fertiliztion Report

2011-10-27T14:42:00.000-07:00

Retrieval day.....

We woke up at 4:45am as we had to be out the door by 5:30.   Cassie decided she would get up at 5:15 also.   She was ready for Grandma to come over and play with her while we went to the doctor.

We got there at 6:30 and they gave me a Valium, a gown, hat and booties and got an IV started. I didn't care for the way the Valium made me feel...kinda like your drunk. Things were pretty fuzzy.

At 7:30 they had me walk to the procedure room. I layed down right away and they had me get my feet in some heavy duty stir-ups, put some oxygen on me and that's pretty much all I remember.   Next thing I know I am waking up horribly nauseous. They had given me zofran in my IV but it didn't do the trick. I also felt like I was burning up and asked for a cold wash cloth to wipe my face with. And then...what I didn't want to happen...I puked....more than once.   Ack.    Instead of staying in recovery for the usually hour I was there for 2 1/2 hours.   I slept a lot...and puked. Nice.   I could have stayed longer but decided I just needed to get home in bed.   It is a HORRIBLE feeling to be sick to your stomach, dizzy and have to be put in a wheel chair and pushed thru a hospital, down an elevator and put in a moving vehicle. I kept my puke bag and slept the whole way home. Walked in the door and said "I need to lay down". I went to bed and Cassie brought me one of her stuffed animals to sleep with. I slept for an hour, woke up, had some Culver's chicken and felt SO MUCH better. I layed on the couch for the rest of the day and went to bed at 7:30.

And now on to the important stuff....

They retrieved 12 eggs
9 of the eggs were mature
8 of the eggs fertilized

Now it is just a waiting game to see how our embabies do.   The doctor will call me on Saturday to give me an update on them and Monday is Transfer Day!!

Future singer??

2011-10-25T06:30:00.000-07:00

Our pediatrician is also a singer, he sings opera. He told me he is very curious about her voice. He told me all singers always work to control their soft palate and because of Cassie's Pierre Robin she has a very high arch to her soft palate so she wouldn't need a lot of work in controlling it. She also has a high pitch to her voice. He said he is very interested to watch her as she grows and that she may have a beautiful singing voice as a result of her palate. Hmmmmm.......something I have never thought about. Cassie may be your next American Idol! :o)

Our smarty pants

2011-10-24T18:25:00.000-07:00

Today was Cassie's 3 year check up.

She is a heavy weight at 26 lbs; 12 ounces.

Her doctor asked her tons of questions including having her count, say the alphabet, talk about colors, about strangers, etc...He really took a lot of time with her. He finally looked at me and said "I think she is one of my smartest patients".   That was so awesome to hear. Of course we think she is smart but to hear her doctor tell us that made me so proud.

On Friday at my check up we had my doctors partner do my u/s. He is from Germany. Cassie counted to 10 for him in German.   He was very impressed and asked if she learned that in school....nope, it is Daddy teaching her. She also knows how to count to 10 in Spanish.

She is also starting to read. She knows all the sounds the letters make , we make words on the fridge with the letter magnets and she is sounding them out. I told our children's librarian this and she thought it was amazing. She asked if she learned it in school and I told her I taught her. She asked if I had a teaching degree.....nope. This homeschooling thing is working! :o)

So proud of her!!

Ready to Trigger!!

2011-10-24T10:27:00.000-07:00

I went in today and have a total of 17 follies with 10 being a good size. Our doctor said "You are definitely triggering tonight" So tonight at 9:30 I trigger and Wednesday is retrieval.

I'm ~~sure~~ know that I will be heading to the clinic on Wednesday with knots in my stomach. I am not a fan of being put under. I will need that valium right when I walk in the door to calm my nerves!!!

After 7 days of stimming....update

2011-10-21T12:48:00.000-07:00

Cass and I went to my doctor today. I now have 13 follies with an E2 level of 600. I have some small follies and my largest is at 13 so my doc thought a couple more days of growth, come in on Sunday to be checked and I may trigger on Monday. Its interesting to compare this cycle to my last cycle.

Last cycle at this time I had 8 follies and my E2 was 222. So my numbers are much better this time around.

Words from a childs mouth

2011-10-19T13:43:00.000-07:00

Cassie and I were just talking about babies. She asked if we had diapers and I said "No, but we will buy diapers if God decides to give us another baby". She said:

"If God says No, we buy a cat"
"If God says Yes, we buy a baby"

Oh my gosh...too funny.

First Monitoring Appointment

2011-10-17T15:53:00.000-07:00

Today I actually had to get out of bed and shower right away and get out the door. I usually grab a mug of coffee, curl up on the couch with Cassie snuggled under blankets to watch cartoons and read my Bible till 8:00. But today I had to head out to my first monitoring appointment. I had to leave the house by 7. I used to do this all the time when I worked, Yes, I have become spoiled being a stay at home Mommy.

It took me an hour to get to my clinc because of rush hour and the sun but I made it on time. I have 6 follicles that my doctor measured and others that were just starting to grow. My doctor said it looks like I am going to be a normal responder. My E2 levels were 106 after 3 days of stimming. On my cycle with Cass my E2 level was only 67 after 4 days of stimming so this cycle I am responding alot better.

3 Year old B-day party in pictures!

2011-10-17T15:40:00.000-07:00

Cake that I slaved over for 3 hours

Waiting for everyone to come!

Hello Kitty!!!

Modeling our party hats

Modeling our Hello Kitty tattoos

Present time!

A card!

Cassie, Val, me and Adelyn reading the card

Monkey Papa, Jake, Daddy, Uncle Jim

Another card!

Great Grandpa and GiGi

Lacing Beads!

Hello Kitty Card...Jackpot!

Cass and Adelyn

Time to sing to the b-day girl

My baby is 3!

Our fam

Playing Kinect

With Monkey Papa

It was a great Hello Kitty birthday!

Got the go ahead!

2011-10-14T18:31:00.000-07:00

This morning I went to my clinic to have an u/s done and lab work, the u/s looked good and they called me letting me know my Estradiol levels were good to go....I am offically suppressed. Thank goodness I don't have the hot flashes I did on my last cycle!

I just did my first found of shots. Lowered the Lupron to 5 units and began Follistim and Menopur. Pretty exciting to be starting the shots! I go back in on Monday to start the monitoring and I will keep going every other day. I am going to be really curious to see how my body responds to these drugs since I am not over supressed like last time.

My girl is 3 years old today!!!

2011-10-13T18:45:00.000-07:00

Really, where does the time go? People say it all the time but it is true.
My baby is now 3 years old. We started off our day with a blueberry muffin and sang Happy Birthday to her.

After breakfast we had class at the Y. Her class sang her Happy Birthday which was really nice. After the Y we went to visit Daddy at his office and went out for a birthday lunch. Where would a 3 year old want to eat? McDonalds of course!!! Chicken Nuggets it was.

After lunch we visited Nana and Papa for awhile. We found my baby book, my Mom had wrote at 3 years old I weighed 25 pounds. Cassie is a little over 26 so she seems to be just like I was.

We got home around 4:00 and made some birthday cupcakes. For dinner we had her favorite meal....Tacos. Then it was present opening time!!

Ready to open!

Dad and Cass

My big 3 year old and I

Tearing them open

After presents we sang Happy Birthday and had a cupcake. It was a fun day! Happy Birthday Cassie!!! We love you!

The next American Idol?

2011-10-12T19:15:00.000-07:00

I found this video that I filmed back in June.

Dancing Queen

2011-10-12T18:58:00.001-07:00

Working in the Yard

2011-10-12T15:23:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we raked some big piles of leaves

And jumped in them. I am sure Daddy would have appreciated us putting them in bags. But we just jumped.

And threw leaves

Yea....I'm pretty sure we were of no help to Daddy and the yard work.

I am wonderfully made

2011-10-10T17:22:00.000-07:00

Cass went to Sunday school again yesterday. It did NOT go as smoothly this time. She told me that the kids sang really loud and she didn't like that. I told her she could plug her ears. But I think she really freaked herself out about it.   She started whimpering right when we walked into church.

I walked her to the class room. She sat on the rug and put her fingers in her ears.   I stayed for a min. and she finally melted down. She was a sobbing mess and couldn't be pried off my neck. It really broke my heart. I could tell she wanted to try and stay and then she would just break down and cry.    The teacher told me she would most likely calm down after I left so I was finally able to get out the door. I stood out of sight out of the class room and listened to her cry. Break a Mommas heart.   Daddy is of no help and wanted to bring her out right away so I told him to go sit down and give it a chance. I knew she had really enjoyed it last week.

Finally I heard her quite down and went to the sanctuary. I checked on her a few times and saw her sitting in the teachers lap during story time/circle time. When I picked her up they said she had been off and on in the beginning but then she got better. She was playing with kids when I picked her up. She saw me and ran over saying "Hi Mom!". She told me "I had fun!" and "I am wonderfully made!".   It was a relief to hear her say she had fun after the traumatizing crying fit.   And she really is soaking up what the teachers are telling her even if she is plugging her ears.

First hair cut

2011-10-08T16:11:00.000-07:00

Today Cassie had her first hair cut. Daddy took pictures. Cassie clung to my hand during the whole thing.

We only cut off 1/2 an inch. We want to keep her hair long. She did really well and thank God for the TV playing the movie Cars. That's what she focused on the whole time.

Looking thrilled

All done!! She put a braid in Cassie's hair and added some glitter.

After the hair cut we went to Toys R Us to get some things for her birthday next week. We also stopped at Grandma and Grandpas. Grandpa is in alot of pain since the Chemo. Supposedly it is caused from the tumor cells dying. I could tell he didn't feel great and he slept pretty much the whole time we visited him. Hoping he feels better soon.

Grandpas first Chemo Treatment

2011-10-06T06:05:00.000-07:00

We were on the road at 7:00 yesterday morning heading to the hospital to be with Monkey Papa as he started his first round of chemo. He was in a great mood and full of jokes for the nurse.

Nurse: Any loss of memory?
Grandpa: Not that I recall

Nurse: Any heart palpation's?
Grandpa: Only when I see my wife

We sat with him for at least an hour before treatment. I took Cassie for a few walks around the hospital, a nurse brought her some cookies and apple juice, she did really well staying at a hospital so long. They took him away and we all went out to grab some breakfast. When we got back we sat out in the hospitals court yard for a while and then we were notified Grandpa was all done and back in a room. We all headed there and he was doing really well. He did have to lay on his back and not move for 6 hours so his artery that was punctured for chemo would clot and heal but everything went well. He should be coming home today.

Here we go again!!

2011-10-02T18:09:00.000-07:00

At 7:00 I gave myself my first shot of Lupron.

Shooting up!!

The firt time I ever did this I made the mistake of trying to slowly push that needle into my stomach. I found out that doesn't work out well. There is resistance. Just have to stab that baby in there....which I did.

First Day of School!!!

2011-10-02T18:04:00.000-07:00

Sunday School!!

I have been telling Cassie she can go to Sunday school. She has to be 3 years old which she will be in 1 1/2 weeks. I have told her she has to listen to her teachers and not cry for me.

We went to church today and she was able to attend Sunday School even though she technically is not 3 yet. We walked to her class room and met her teacher then Cassie walked right into the room without even looking back at me. I told her teacher I wasn't sure how it would go because she hated the nursery. She screamed bloody murder in the nursery. I went to the sanctuary to listen to the sermon and just stared at the screen expecting Cassie's number to flash up there indicating I was needed. Her number never flashed.

After church I went to her classroom. There were kids playing and she was sitting at a table with a teacher drawing. They called her name and she walked over to me. No tears or anything. I asked how she had been and they said she didn't say a word the whole class.(awwww!) She must have just been taking everything in because after we left she told me some of the kids names and some things they did.

I asked her if she had fun, she said yes.
I asked her if she wanted to go back, she said yes.

What she did in Sunday School

So, I will be talking up Sunday school for next week. I hope it continues to go well!!

2011-10-02T17:53:00.000-07:00

On Saturday we went to the pumpkin patch. It turned out to be a beautiful day to go. But before we left we had to wait for the cable guy to arrive at our house. They gave us an estimate between 8-noon. Of course it was 11:50 when he arrived. So after all that waiting around we went to Culvers for lunch and then to get pumpkins.

Cass got her face painted. She picked an ice cream cone.

Of course being the animal lover that she is she fed goats and rode the pony. If there is a pony ride anywhere you can be sure to find Cassie on it.

She played on the hay bails and after this we went on the train ride. We waited in line for 10 min. We were second in line and there were 2 other families behind us. There are only 3 cars on the train. The train pulled up, people got off and we started towards the train. The 2 family's behind us raced around us to the train. That left us with no room to ride the train. I was ticked. I was sooooooo mad. Really? You just skipped us. Really? You feel its ok to teach your children to do this? I couldn't believe it. Like I said...I was MAD and I did NOT hide my feelings. We didn't say anything directly to the people, which maybe we should have, but I told Cassie very loudly that we could not go on the train because people skipped us. She started crying. Finally one of the guys and his child (who skipped) said they would get off and gave us room. That was fine and dandy it just still blows my mind that people are so rude and they are teaching their children its ok to act like this. We would NEVER allow Cassie to do this. We purposely wait in line and wait for our turn. Its a good thing for kids to know but obviously not every parent thinks there are rules or manners. Anyhooo....

After the train ride we picked out pumpkins. Daddy got the big pumpkin free because he won a game. Cassie has the gords in her bedroom.

Then we headed home.

Prayer Request for Monkey Papa

2011-10-01T08:07:00.000-07:00

Monkey Papa, hubby's Dad found out in April he has liver cancer.   He was told in April if he did not do anything he had 5 months to live. Well....its going on 6 months and he seems OK. He is having some symptoms but not many, the doctors say he is a mystery.

He is currently part of a trial for a pill. He has been taking it for 10 days, tomorrow is his last day of the pill and Wednesday he starts Chemo.  The doctors have told him once he starts chemo he will start feeling sick.

Please say some prayers for him.

Lupron is a go!!

2011-09-30T13:05:00.001-07:00

We had an appointment this morning at our clinic. I had to have a mock transfer so I needed a full bladder. That was so not fun, especially when she pushed on my bladder with the u/s wand.   I had to cocentrate with all my might and was practically biting my fingers trying to not pee. Things seem to be a little weakened after having a baby.  I was so glad once that was done.   Clearly I don't need that much water to have a full bladder...I will remember this once my transfer happens.

We signed consent forms and I had a blood draw to verify I ovulated. The doctor called me an hour ago and said all looks good.   I am to start Lurpon shots Sunday!   I really can't beleive we are doing this again but I am excited!!!

At one point during the u/s the nurse said I could go to the bathroom just a tiny bit...easier said than done.   She had me run across the hall to the bathroom with just a sheet on.   Crazy stuff and you just have to laugh about it! What we IVFers do to have a baby.

They came today....

2011-09-29T18:58:00.000-07:00

my meds for IVF #2.

I can't wait to jam some needles into my tummy. I can't wait to go in for those lovely internal u/s. My husband can't wait to jab me in the arse with that huge needle full of progesterone. No seriously...I really think he may be looking forward to it. Ok, in all honesty none of that bothers me. Because our first round brought us our Cassie so maybe this round will bring us another baby to love.

It brought back so many emotions going thru the box. I remember how overwhelming it was the first time. All of this stuff to possibly get pregnant, not a for sure thing, not guaranteed that you will have a baby bump. This time I didn't have any of those emotions. I'm excited. And if it doesn't work the first time I am just hoping we have alot more embryos than our first cycle so we can have some more chances. And if that doesn't work out either....then I'm ok with it. I just feel like we need to try another cycle. Its all in Gods hands and I'm at total peace with this.

I freaked her out

2011-09-24T20:28:00.000-07:00

I guess my story telling is excellent. I got this book from the library...I remember it when I was little and always thought it was a fun book.

I got really into it and at one point made Cassie jump. That did it. She told me I had to stop reading it because there was a monster at the end of the book and Grover was telling us not to read it. She refused to let me continue and I even had to hide the book in a drawer. I had Matt bring it out again to try and she immediately shook her head NO. She said the book scares her. Sorry Grover.

2011-09-24T20:20:00.000-07:00

They heard sirens coming

Friday we went to our first Homecoming parade. I don't think I ever even went when I was in Highschool. We went with our friends and had a really great time. Cassie's last parade expereinces have not been the best but 3rd times a charm and this parade was a hit.

The girls didn't care for the sirens

Such a great group of friends

We got tons of candy...some that I had to pick over since they were still choking hazards. Cassie did tell me the mascots and other people dressed up were freaky. Her words...not mine.

Jackson, Cassie, Morgan, Adelyn

Jackson and Cass

Glad we have such a great group of friends to hang out with!

Happy Friday!!

2011-09-23T10:55:00.000-07:00

Look at this pose!! ATTITUDE!!

ATTITUDE = Cassie. Boy did this girl have it the other day. I found myself taking multiple deep breaths a day. She was testing my patience yesterday...holy cow. Thankfully those days of attitude are few and far between but when its one of those days jeepers creepers!!

Yesterday morning we had to run to Target to get some stuff for her birthday party next month. We usually do preschool stuff in the morning but yesterday we did it in the afternoon and found out that does not work out well. At. All. We will not be doing that again. Mornings are much more easier for her to sit down, listen to instructions and think thru things.

This morning we went to Gymlingo for open gym with all our friends. We had a really good time. Afterwards we went to the library with our friends Stacey, Adelyn and Bree. We always walk out of there with so many books. And now....she is sleeping!! After 2 weeks of no naps she told me she was ready to sleep. This was at 12:30. Hallelujah!!! She must have been really worn out. Good thing she is taking a nap because we are heading to the Homecoming parade this afternoon with all our friends. And Mommy is not so sure how this will go. Our last 2 experiences with parades has not been the best. She has not liked the loud drums from the bands or the sirens from the fire truck/police cars. She was a terrified bundle of tears. Maybe today will be different. I told her the drums would be loud and so would the sirens and she seemed fine with it. We will see about that.

North Woods Trip

2011-09-20T12:24:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we got back home after being up in Eagle River for 5 days. It was one of the best vacations I have had up there. We left on Thursday and stayed the night at the cabin. It was a much better visit since there were no ticks and this time I didn't get bite on the eye by a spider....so yes...much better!!

Cassie leaving the cabin

It was COLD!! Gloves and mittens needed!

Daddy and Cassie

Off into the great unknown!

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On Friday we had reservations at the Wild Eagle Lodge. It was fantastic! I loved it. The place was so clean and so geared towards family. We are totally going back next year!

We were checking out the beach

The playground

She saw Daddy coming

The living room

Kitchen

Beautiful view of the lake

Master Bedroom

Cassie's room

View from our patio

Our Patio

Seriously I would live here.

Uncle Jim, Tammy and Valerie came up to the cabin on Friday and Grandpa and Grandma Rosek came up on Friday night.

On Saturday night we all went out to dinner and headed back to the cabin for a bonfire. Valerie is 9 years old and is an excellent hoola hooper. Cassie is working hard at becoming good!

Hoola Hooping!!

Valerie and Cass

We started a scavenger hunt

Laying out all their "treasures of the forest"

Proud of all her stuff!

Grandma and Cass

We were planning on leaving Sunday but we were having such a great time we decided to stay another night. Everyone came over to "our place" to the Packer Game and have pizza. After a nap and everyone left we went swimming in the pool and came back to our cozy lodge. Cassie went to bed while Matt and I turned on the gas fireplace, he made Chinese and we watched a scary movie.

Mmm...juice

Daddy's girl

Acting goofy

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On Monday we packed up and headed home. Now I'm working on catching up on laundry and all that fun stuff while Miss Cass decides she once again does not need naps since were home.

"There is something about Cassie"

2011-09-14T12:50:00.000-07:00

I have heard this 3 times now. The first time was in the NICU. A nurse was carrying her back for her first surgery and said "There is just something about her".

The next time was a couple months ago at the library. I was talking to the children's Librarian and she said the exact same words.   "There is something about Cassie".

Someone else just said it to me the other day. I had a new play date Mom come over to my place. We know each other through story time and have only talked briefly. I saw her at the park the other day and she asked if we could do a play date with her and her daughter...so we scheduled one. When they were over here she told me that she wanted to have a play date with me and Cassie just from watching Cassie in story time. She said Cassie seems so kind, listens well...then she said "There is just something about her".   Talk about making me a Momma proud. I did tell her Cassie has her days. She is not perfect let me tell ya! She has her terrible two tantrums just like any other 2 year old and she gets put in the corner more often than she would like. But...it was so nice to hear.   So I take it when I hear "There is something about Cassie" that it is a good thing :o)

On the IVF front I went today for my day 3 FSH. Cassie came with me. I did not know I would be having a fun internal U/S but Cassie was so well behaved. She just sat next to me and held my hand. The cyst is gone and everything is looking good to go. My meds should be ordered this week. This appointment cost me $840!!   Crazy expensive. But it is what it is.

After the doctor we went to McDonald's with Daddy for lunch.   3 little old ladies stopped at our table and told us how they were talking about how pretty Cassie was. Put a smile on my face. Actually....it puts a smile on my face when she puts a smile on others faces.

I told Cassie we were trying for a baby again and these were the words out of her mouth, " I don't want a baby. I want a cat. A cat is better"   Ooooook. Maybe she will get a cat even if we do get pregnant again. I haven't told Daddy that. :o)

My Dad and Mom

2011-09-11T14:21:00.000-07:00

Today my Dad and Mom got baptized.

This makes me so happy. It was amazing to see them confess their faith in Jesus Christ as their savior in front of the congregation. My eyes watered and Cassie, I and the whole congregation clapped for them afterwards. Our pastor actually talked about my family after they were baptized. He mentioned me, how I had gone to youth group (over 16 years ago) and he talked to me about my parents. He mentioned their store they once owned and how he used to go there just to talk to them. He told the congregation how they came to last years Easter service and their hearts changed and ever since then their faith has been growing like weeds. It was amazing. I'm so blessed to belong to a wonderful church, have a wonderful pastor who helped lead my parents to Christ and to know I will see my parents in Heaven one day.

After church Cassie and I went to their house to celebrate. Matt missed the baptism but showed up at their house later. He missed the Baptism because he was flying home from a wedding.

My parents grilled out hot dogs, had pasta, baked beans and some really good Brownies. Then we headed home . Cass fell asleep in the car pretty much right away. I transported her to the couch and Daddy fell asleep beside her. So here I sit updating my blog.

Unfortunately I have to go wake up this little girl so she goes to bed at a decent time. This may not be good...I could have a little monster on my hands waking her up from a nap. Here it goes.....

Animals, Animals....

2011-09-07T13:11:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we went to the petting zoo. It was quite the drive and kinda pricey to get into but we really enjoyed it.

Cassie is an animal lover just like her Momma!

Of course she had to ride the pony...no question about it!

A regular little cow girl

She loved the goats "to death". I know this poor little goat looks like he is gasping for air but he was OK. I made sure of it.

I love the goats to...especially the babies. They are so sweet.

Threw a few balls with Daddy

And the kittens. My favorite. Daddies favorite and Cassie's favorite. They were so sweet.

The kittens were all adoptable. We were pretty close in taking the little black guy home. Cassie looooved him and he was very tolerant of her. We had 2 cats before Cassie was here and we vowed to never have one again. Our one cat was good but the other cat was mentally unstable. Really. He was marked at the vets office as the most aggressive cat they had ever seen. He was sweet as sugar with me but anyone else he was going to attack. He also liked to pee in places besides his litter box. Not good. BUT....I am an animal lover and think its a great thing for a child to grow up with a pet. We want to wait for a dog till she is older because of the experience we had with Athena and her. So...we when do get a cat I am hoping he is sane and is happy to use his litter box.

This cow was SO sweet. Yes, I was making kissy faces with him.

Cassie practiced milking a cow and then did the real deal.

The mule LOVED Matt. Liked really loved him.

Followed him every where.

And last of all was the big pig. Cassie had a love/hate thing going on with him. She loved him if she was in my arms but was pretty afraid to be near him on her own.

Totally plan on going again next year!

Preschool at home!

2011-09-07T12:52:00.000-07:00

Gluing the apples on the tree

I started some homeschooling for preschool last week. I am using the curriculum from www.confessionsofahomeschooler.com

She is wearing a band-aid above because she lost her balance and knocked her face into the table. There was no scratch, bump or blood but band-aids always help. Therefore the band-aid.

I am really happy with the curriculum so far. Cassie loves it. She asks to do it every day and I am amazed at how well she does. She catches on so fast!!

We have been setting up shop in the kitchen

She organized all her shapes correctly and glued them on the correct shape

Did her Dot Art

Practing Tracing

I am really enjoying doing this stuff with her. Its alot of fun and so much fun to see her learn. We have also started teaching her German. Actually.....Matt has been teaching her. She has a vocab of about 4-5 German words right now.

My Hubby - Up and Coming Lawyer

2011-08-31T06:36:00.000-07:00

My hubby was selected to be part of the Up and Coming Lawyers. Last night we went to the Wisconsin Club so he could get his award. They had amazing food and we hung out with Matts parents, my parents and his brother, Tammy and 2 of the firm partners. Matts aunt and cousin came over to watch Cassie. It was a really nice night. Congrats Matt!!

Another use for tupperware.....

2011-08-24T11:45:00.000-07:00

House is cleaned, dishes done, tub washed, cupboards wiped down, ran 2 1/2 miles, dinner in the crock pot, Cassie down for a nap....time for me to sit down!!

Cass with her doggy stuffed animals

Every day Cassie wears her sleeping beauty dress. Last week she added a crown I made and also some nice warm mittens. I love seeing what sort of ensembles she puts together....and boy were her little hands nice and sweaty in those mittens. She was watching Jake and the Never land pirates....she told me she was a pirate princess.

Cassie is fascinated with bugs. She always wants me to grab the daddy long legs that are around but those I refuse to touch!! However the exoskeleton of a bug I don't mind. I lost count of how many I helped Cassie pick up and put in a Tupperware container (which will be thrown away after this use)

The above bowl of bug carcass' is currently sitting on my patio warming up in the heat because a certain proud little girl wants to show Daddy all her bugs. She wanted to bring them inside.....uh. NO.She already accidentally dumped them outside so I had to help her put all of them back in the bowl again. Nothing like scooping up great big handfuls for bug skins....let me tell ya.

Cass and her bowl of Cicada bugs

IVF #2......take 2

2011-08-19T12:03:00.000-07:00

We had our consult with our new IVF clinic yesterday. It went really well. We like our doctor. We have a plan. If everything goes smoothly and we have no hitches we are planning a transfer the first week in November. Of course all of this could change if something happens but for now that is what its looking like. Next month I will do my day 3 FSH and if all looks good we will start lupron and we are on our way.

Homeschooling supplies

2011-08-19T11:57:00.000-07:00

So I am planning on starting some homeschooling this fall. I ordered a curriculum from another blog. She is a Christian homeschooling Mom of 4 children and I really liked her curriculum. Very basic, colorful, fun for a preschooler. I don't want to have a strict schedule at this young of an age so we are going to go slowly and have fun with it! I didn't really plan on starting till 4 years old but she loves crafts and things like that so I think we will incorporate some of the curriculum into that. It will be interesting to see how it goes and I'm looking forward to it!!

I also found these (Below)!! I was pretty excited about it and I found them at Kmart no less and I HATE Kmart. Hate Kmart with a passion.

We should be able to use these for a couple of years. The one book is pretty big and it gets more in depth as you go along. Pretty excited about that buy.

At Kmart I also bought some new play-do. Set Cassie at the table with it, a bowl and plastic knife and that kept her occupied while Mommy cooked dinner.

I also found this at Kmart! Pretty impressed!

A hug for our Pastor

2011-08-16T12:09:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Cassie requested a crown to wear with her princess dress. Clifford also needed a crown...so Mommy got the siccors and glue and went to work.

Today we went to Kids Fest. They really do a great job with it. We spent most of the time at our churchs tent. They had a pool filled with water and bubble bath with a pool blower....this results in a TON of bubbles. Cassie loved it. They also had a table filled with play-do, cookie cutters and rolling pins....another hit. Pastor Terry made Cassie a balloon animal and she gave him a hug. I loved that...there was just something about seeing my daughter hug him. I started going to our church and Pastor Terry when I was in high school. He helped bring me to Christ. He is an amazing Pastor. He did our pre-marital counseling, he married Matt and I, he prayed over Cassie in our car at the Starbucks parking lot when she was a baby. I have known him for over 16 years....and to see Cassie hug him tugged at my heart.

Showing off her balloon animal from Pastor Terry

The stinker purposely turning her back to the camera

I also told Pastor Terry my Dad and Mom had become Christians. They have been going to church with us since Easter 2010. His Easter sermon had really effected them. Again...an amazing pastor who really does a great job spreading Gods word. He deserved a hug!!

Whats in your heart?

2011-08-15T11:06:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we went to Aunt Dia's to celebrate all 5 of the cousins birthdays. Sarahs old Dora house was a big hit. She spent the majority of the time playing with it.

Cassie also loves Sarah. I love watching them together. For dinner we had pizza but Cassie didn't touch a piece of it. She chowed down on Aunt Dia's super yummy cheese dip and chips. I can't blame the girl!

Sarah and Cassie

Jake, Cassie, Sarah

The Dora house = FUN!!

Whats in Cassies heart???

I got this awsome book from the library called the Big Picture Story Bible. I highly recommend it. Cassie loves it! Every morning she drinks her milk and I drink my coffee while we read it. Today we read it for 45 min (the girl loves reading). She kept asking about Abraham, and is fasinated with the pictures of the river that turned to blood and some other pictures. After reading she looked at me and said "Mom, I have Jesus in my heart" She then lifted up her shirt, pointed to her heart and said "See?"
It was the sweetest thing.

A picture with some of her stuffed animals

Road Rage

2011-08-12T19:38:00.000-07:00

This morning we went to my Grandmas. My Grandma, Mom, myself and Cassie worked in the garden. Rather....everyone but me worked in the garden. My Mom and Grandma pulled weeds and vegetables while I sat on the ground and watched. Its amazing to have 4 generations together and I took it all in.

After my Grandmas we stopped at the grocery store where I spent way more than I planned. I just needed a bag of salad and I walked out with multiple bags. Those darn sales!!! How could I pass up "Buy 2 and save blah, blah blah"? Sucker. Plus I was hungry....never a good thing to shop when hungry.

And the road rage....was by a blond in pink. I don't know who she thought she was but she kept trying to mow me down. Crazy women drivers!!

See that look?

She came very close to hitting me with her car after this picture. See the conniving in her eyes? She was planning her attack on me.

And another round around the pool only to try to run down her Mommy again.

The other day I went to pick her up and she said "No, Mommy. Don't pick me up. I'm not a baby anymore" Mommies lip pouted!! The next day she told me "Your the best Mommy ever" so that made up for her telling me she is not a baby anymore.....little does she know she will ALWAYS be my baby!!

No Pity Party Allowed!!!

2011-08-11T19:51:00.000-07:00

Today Cass and I went to a birthday party for a friend. On the way home I felt a little bit sad. I thought about it and realized the feelings of sadness were because everyone at the party had at least 2 kids or were pregnant with their 2nd. It wasn't the same kind of sadness as before we had Cassie....I think the pain of wanting to be a Mom and having empty arms is 10 million times worse. This sadness is over the fact that I just can't get pregnant like everyone else and the fact that Cassie may not have a sibling. However, I refuse to let those feelings stick around because God has blessed me with my daughter and I WON'T mope about and be sad for what I don't have and may never have. We have been blessed with so many things: roof over our heads, my husbands good job, the ability to be a stay at home and of course my miracle girl. Thank you Lord for everything you have given me!!

Next Thursday we have our first consult with our 3rd IVF doctor. Hopefully we won't run into any road blocks like we did last time!

Play Time

2011-08-10T12:20:00.000-07:00

Cassie and Bri

Yesterday we had our friends Stacey, Adelyn and the newest addition Bri come over for a play date. Cassie has held Bri and is really good with her. Again....I told her Mommy and Daddy were going to try for a baby and would she like that? She said "yes" and then "cat". I've told her if it doesn't work out she can have a cat....the girl is happy with either option. Ha!

The girls decided that just because they didn't have their swim suits on that wasn't going to stop them from going in the pool. Adelyn went in first and it is "monkey see, monkey do" so in went Cassie.

Trouble

Ice Cream Sandwich break and the Mommies also put the girls in swimsuits

Play date over - Good bye hug!!

Aftermath of a play date....pictures do not do it justice. How is it that every toy is found and thrown on the floor??

Butterfly Hunting

2011-08-10T12:07:00.000-07:00

.....or at least attempting to.

1,2,3....JUMP!

Last Day with Uncle Lee

2011-08-10T12:02:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday Uncle Lee flew back home to San Diego. Friday we went to Gigi's and Great Grandpas house for lunch. Cassie loves my Grandmas garden! She enjoys picking the raspberries and any ripe vegetable she can find. A garden may be in our future next year. Just don't know what to do about all the deer in our back yard. Later in the day I had my family over for tacos and to hang out.

Lee and Cassie playing Elefun

Lee HAD to play this game with Cassie since it was his Christmas present to her from last year.

Showing Uncle Lee how its done

Mom and Lee

Cassie told me 2 days ago "I love Uncle Lee". They really did seem to click right away. We may have to start annual trips out to San Diego to see him, plus it is beautiful out there and so many great things to do with Cassie.

Terrorizing Cassie

Family time up North

2011-08-01T13:51:00.000-07:00

Mmmm...chips and dip

Last Wednesday we drove to my parents cabin in Pickeral. Its about a 3 1/2 hour drive and my brother is here from California visiting. We arrived around 6:00 and Cass dove into the chips and dip my Mom laid out. She was so happy to be there and to see Papa and Nana. She hadn't seen Uncle Lee in close to 2 years. The last time she saw him she was 1 year old and her g-tube was removed but the hole was not closing up. She also had stranger anxiety still so it was a total nightmare. This time around was great!

Trying out her own chair

Athena and Cassie

Making French Toast with Papa

My girl and me

Uncle Lee "flying" Cassie around the room

Uncle Lee bought Cassie a Tinkerbell outfit so of course she wore it about every day and he would fly her around the living room. In fact...Cassie may be a bit spoiled. She got gifts from her Nana and Papa every day!! A bug catcher, Safari animals, Clifford book and a big red stuffed Clifford.

Uncle Lee and Cass

Ready to go on the boat

On Thursday we stayed around the cabin. We went for a boat ride which Cassie did very well on. Last time she hated her life jacket but this time she loved it. She wasn't crazy when Papa went really really fast but she was a good sport about it. However....she refused to go on the boat after that. Later that evening we went to my Aunt Lola's for pizza and met her huge German Shepperd....Maggie. Which of course Cassie loved...she is my animal lover. Just like Mommy.

Matt and his fish

The guys (Matt, my Dad and Lee) did a lot of fishing. Matt also fished with Cassie. She has the concept for dropping the bobber and waiting for the fish but she does not have the patients to wait for the fish.

Maggie and Cassie

My brother and his fish

Uncle Lee and Cassie

Cassie LOVED my brother. The first night she gave him a kiss right on the lips. I was shocked. I wish he lived closer and so we could see him more often because Cassie loved him and....I miss my little brother.

Cassie and Athena

Athena got tons of attention. She spent most of her time in the lake but when she was up at the cabin Cassie was right at her side.

On Friday we spent all day at a nice beach. We grilled out hot dogs, swam and the guys went on the boat. Cassie did not want to go...she wanted to stay and play in the water.

My Dad and bro

Daddy, Cassie and Mommy

Brother and Sister

Swimming in her "Baby Whale"

Athena and Cassie tuckered out after a long day

Eating Taco Dip!

Mmmmmm!

View from the cabin

Loons

We also went skiing. I have not skied in 16 years and amazingly it all came back to me. I don't have any pictures of me but I did ski and got up every single time without a problem. I did have a pretty nasty fall because my Dad went over some pretty bad wake. I knew it was coming and started to scream...before I knew it I was flying out of my skis and crashing face first into the water. It was a great time! Matt and Lee also skied. My Dad ~~did~~ tried too.

Putting on his life vest (Too small?)

Yep.....too small

Ready Dad?

Trying to get up but a no go....Good try Dad!

Lee's turn

He was pretty good

Show off

And crash landing

On Saturday afternoon a storm rolled in. It was nasty. The wind and rain were so strong that we ended up without power. So the rest of the day/night and the next day were without power, running water, no flushing toilets...so we roughed it. We ate dinner by candle and fortunately my Dad had a small generator that we grabbed from his other property so we had some light.

Daddy and Cassie

Matt, Cassie and Papa

We had a great time. When we left Cassie said "Mom, that was fun" That's all I needed to hear. Family is so important and I want her to love hanging out with family and have great memories after all...family is what its all about.

Ice-Cream

2011-07-19T19:26:00.000-07:00

When ice-cream melts....drink it!!

Oh Lord....such a mess!

This reminded me of what my brother and I used to do when we were young. Beware...its pretty gross. We loved when our ice-cream melted. Like LOVED it so much we would do anything to make it become liquid as fast as possible. We would take big mouthfuls of ice-cream, swish it around in our mouths until it was liquid, spit the liquid/spit ice-cream back in our bowls. Stir. Repeat. Once it was all liquid - tip that bowl to your mouth like Cassie and drink away. Mmmmmmm.....!!!!

New friend born!!

2011-07-17T11:39:00.000-07:00

Our friends Adelyn and Eugene had their new baby girl on Friday. Adelyn is now a big sister. When I told Cassie that the baby was coming out of Stacey's belly and Adelyn was going to have a baby sister she said "Where is my baby sister?" Ouch. Break my heart. It brought tears to my eyes. I told her Mommy and Daddy were working on it and if it didn't work out would she like a cat? She flipped her lid. Said she wanted a baby cat and went on and on with how she will hug it, kiss it, sleep with it...... That made me smile. It was like forget the sibling just give me a cat.

We stopped at the hospital on Saturday to visit them. It was funny because Stacy's nurse is one of our play date friends and the anesthesiologist is the Dad of one of the little guys we have play dates with. So the one Mom helped deliver Stacey's baby...how cool is that.

This little girls hair is getting so long! There are days it is out of control and will not behave and there are others where it has just the perfect wave to it. Yesterday was one of those good hair days. I try so many products on her hair to figure out how to keep it in control. Since it has wave I can NOT comb it. That will just frizz it out. I always have to finger comb. I also only wash her hair once a week. The rest of the days I just condition it. Mommy has straight hair and so does Daddy.....where are the wave/curls from?

Please doesn't always get you what you want....

2011-07-13T13:11:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Cassie was naughty and threw a pudding. An open pudding.   Yea.
She then told me she didn't like the pudding and wanted a cookie. I told her "No" because she threw her pudding.

She then said "I'm sorry for throwing the pudding. Can I please have a cookie?"   Well sure you sweet thing. I mean she apologized for being naughty and then said "please"!   I gave her the cookie and it flew out of her hand onto the floor.

She THEN asked for something else. I told her "No" because she had thrown both her pudding and cookie.   She then apologized again and said "please" for the new item she wanted.   Sneaky little girl.

I told her "No" again.   She looked at me with a puzzled look on her face and said "What in the world?"   It was the funniest thing. It was like she couldn't beleive her pleading wasn't working this time around.

Cassie and her BFF

The above picture was taken today. I watched Adelyn because her Mom had a doctor appointment. She is scheduled for a c-section on Friday. I took Adelyn and Cassie to the park. They thought it was the greatest thing to be riding in the car together. They are so great together.

Weekend in Iowa

2011-07-11T12:47:00.000-07:00

This past weekend we drove to Iowa for a wedding. It took us about 6 hours to get there and it went pretty smoothly. The first 2 hours we constantly heard "Where are we going?" I think that could be used as a torture technique because it was seriously driving me nutty after 2 hours.

But....we made it to Iowa. I didn't take Cassie to the ceremony on Saturday. It was during nap time and I did not want to skip a nap and pay the price during the reception. Plus....I knew she wouldn't sit quietly in church during the ceremony. Matt told me other people brought their toddlers and they had to leave the ceremony because they wouldn't be quite so I was happy with my decision.

View from our window

Cassie's room

Our Room

Cassie loved the reception. I was stressed out until dinner was over. Cassie was with her 2nd cousin Sarah and I was on the opposite side of the table. I was trying to get over by her but people filing in were blocking my way. Then I heard her high pitched scream wayyyyy up at the front of the hall. My little girl was trying to get to me also and freaked out because she couldn't find me.

There was so much glass ware and stuff on the tables for dinner it was crazy. Glass and Toddlers is not a good combo. There wasn't any room to put anything. We started eating and she gagged on some lettuce. Good way to give me a heart attack. Her eyes were watering and she just was looking at me funny. I quickly picked her up and stood her on the chair and a bunch of chewed up lettuce came out. I think she has a habit of taking too big of bites and it gets to the back of her throat before she is ready. She gags (which looks alot like choking to me) and gets it out. But really....5 seconds seems like forever when it is happening. Choking is my biggest fair.....always has been.

Once dinner was over I was able to relax. We spent the rest of the night on the dance floor. Cassie and I were the first ones out and danced with the bride. Cassie was all about the bride. She though she was Cinderella. Her eyes just lit up whenever she came by. The photographer was taking a bunch of pics of Cassie and she rocked her moves on the dance floor. At 9:30 she was worn out. She said good-bye to Cinderella and we went off to bed.

Ready for the wedding

Sunday we came home and it was NOT a fun ride. The first few hours were fine. She fell asleep for only 30 min and woke up not a happy camper. She was so tired and wanted to sleep but couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep in the car. We stopped at McDonald's and took a potty break. People must have thought I was beating her in the bathroom. She had THE WORST tantrum. Screamed at the top of her lungs. She was just so tired. She screamed so bad she almost made herself vomit in the car. Poor girl was so wiped out. She finally settled down and we got moving. Then she had to poop. And she only wanted to poop in her potty at home.....which was still a couple hours away. So then she tried holding it which made matters worse. Near the end she was in pain. OH NOT FUN!! It took us 7 hours to get home. 7 hours is a long time in a car for a little gal.....and for Mommy. Glad were home.

4th of July

2011-07-06T14:04:00.000-07:00

We had a great 4th of July weekend. Everything that I remember as a kid. Warm sunny days, grill outs with friends and family, the beach and catching fireflys at night.

I love seeing everything thru Cassie's eyes. It brings me back to being a child and enjoying the simple things in life. Such a blessing.

Today we went to the pool with our friends Stacey and Adelyn. We stayed for 3 1/2 hours. Cassie had such a good time but she did start to melt down when it was time to go. The girl is now out like a light after a long fun day in the sun and sand.

While at the pool I saw an old friend whos sister is going thru IVF. We talked about the emotional and costly side of it and how her sister was doing. My friend Stacey (who was with us at the pool) is pregnant and the new little baby could come any day. My old friend asked me if it bothered me to see her pregnant and I said "no". I told her when she first told me I felt those old sad feelings creep up but they didn't stick around and it doesn't bother me at all. I told her its WAY harder to be childless and have empty arms....I at least have my one blessing.

Yesterday I made an appointment for a consult with a different IVF clinic. Its scheduled for next month. I feel kinda torn. I SO want another baby and want Cassie to have a sibling but on the other hand I don't look forward to doing IVF again, the cost and the emotional toll it all takes. I am so happy right now with the life God has given me. To start this emotional journey again doesn't exactly trip my trigger. If only it were easy to do it the old fashioned way we would have 5 kids by now....

A few more pics of my drama queen....the drama has been in high gear the past few weeks. Every day this princess is pretty much sent to the corner.

Me...a drama queen??

Ready for the 4th

Adelyn, Cassie and their Dads

Mmmmm...ice-cream sandwiches

Cleft Palate Clinic

2011-06-29T13:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Cassies first cleft palate clinic at Childrens Hospital. We had to be there at 8 am and didn't get out of there till 11:45. 4 hours in a hospital is a LONG time for a toddler!!!

This is what Cassie was born with. Even though it was fixed children can still have problems with speech so we follow up with the cleft palate clinic every year.

She had to see 4 doctors. Speech, hearing test, ENT, have photos taken of her jaw and see the plastic surgeion. None of the doctors have any concerns or worries. Her tubes are still in and if they don't fall out by fall they may need to be removed. She passed the hearing test with flying colors and the speech therapist said "She is doing very well" in speech. There was some nasal emissions but it was not consistent so she knows Cassie can say things correctly. The ENT also remarked on how good her vocab was.

We see the speech therapist in 6 months to follow up. We just want to make sure the nasal emissions she makes with certain letters do not become a habit so I will continue to work at home with her on that. We do the cleft palate clinic in a year again.

Afterwards we went to McDonalds for chicken nuggets and she fell asleep on the way home so no nap was in my future from her once we got home. I took her to the beach and then we went for ice-cream. She deserved a fun day after the morning we had.

Cassie belongs on Xmen

2011-06-27T12:07:00.000-07:00

I beleive Cassie has a mutation. Have you seen X-MEN? We saw it over the weekend and I am pretty sure she could have played Banshee on X-MEN. His mutation is he has a super sonic scream. The definition of Super Sonic Scream is this: The ability to generate vocal sounds of a higher amplitude than a normal human. Yep, totally Cassie.

We went to church on Sunday and during the announcments Cassie's mutation took over.   I could feel it starting so I went to pick her up to carry her out of the sactuary but by doing that I only made the mutation generate faster.   Her scream went super sonic in the sactuary during the announcments. I fought to pick her up and she did that whole toddler stiffen up routine. I finally got her out of there and she was a snotty teary mess.   I cringe thinking about it now.   A little old woman came up to me and said " I remember those days".   I thought she was talking about having a little one. I said "She just had a freak out". The sweet little lady said "I know, I heard". Well of course, how could you not?!!    Super sonic remember?    She was in the sactuary and witnessed it and said she looked at her daughter and said "I remember those days" and her daughter said "I do too". Its so nice to have other Moms understand.

My 89 year old Grandma is a different story. I talked to her today and told her what happened she said "I have never been around a child who suddenly does that. Maybe you can find someone to talk to who can tell you what the problem is and what you can do about it."   Ummm...yea.   I told her its normal and thats where the terrible two term comes from.   I suppose when your 89 you forget what having a toddler can be like.

On another note, Cassie had a little cold over the weekend. Just a really plugged up nose. Friday she was eating a chicken nugget.   It is hard to eat/swallow well when you can't even breath, well she started gagging.   Then there was nothing. I quickly picked her up and stood her and smacked her back. Nothing. No gag, no cry, no sound. The no gag is what scared me and my gut was I had to do the heimlich.   I just had this feeling and I wrapped my arms around her, gave one quick thrust and out came chicken. She started crying.   Scary but I'm glad I didn't panic and just did it.